Ah, first day? Someone asked me
Yes. I replied
Forwarding hand he said ‘My name is Anirudh….Anirudh
khadka.
‘Hi I’m
Sopnil…..Sopnil Shah’ Shaking hand I
said in same style
‘Unique name’, he said
I
nodded.
This was the first day I meet Anirudh. Even
then I was unaware that this short acquaintance at college entrance would lead
to a life time of friendship. I was very happy to find friend like him. Day by
day our friendship bequeathed us new experience and spirit.
That day I was invited to Anirudh’s
house. His mother told me that he always chitchats about me. I felt very happy
to hear that. Like all typical Nepalese mothers she began to ask about my
family, parents and I kept on answering. At same time pressure cooker disturbed
our conversation…hiss hiss… hiss…..hiss….. ‘Just a minute babu I will come’ she
said and headed towards kitchen. Taking benefit of situation I and Anirudh went
to his room.
I look around; his room was wide with
white walls, blue carpet, a desk with a PC; a futon bed and a chair; a very big
Rack and shelf with loads of books from Psychology to literature and political
science. My eyes noticed a book “Palpasa Cafe” by Narayan Wagle.
Taking the book I asked ‘Isn’t he the
Editor of Nagarik Daily?
‘Yes he’s amazing. Read this novel,
you may include another name in your ideals list.’ he replied very proudly
‘It’s that good’ I asked
Yes it revolves round the life of an
artist and his hidden passionate love for a girl named Palpasa.
‘It’s in English’, I said spinning the
pages.
Out of the blue, a photo falls from the book.
It’s a girl; same as our age. She was standing on boat leasing her arms open
and the background of, probably Machhapuchre Himal. Anirudh tried to snatch the photo from me.
It’s mine’ he said shyly.
‘I can see that my friend but who is
this girl in boat?
Nobody, give it back to me
I said ‘so Anirudh has a girlfriend,
you dark horse’
‘He seriously said ‘Koena! And it’s
nothing like what you think. She is just reminiscence’, I find some mystery in
his words.
He continued ‘This photo was taken at Pokhara,
during college tour. That was the day when I proposed her. I was in Grade XI.
‘Now where is she’ I asked curiously
No I don’t know and I don’t want to
find her either, he said in ignoring voice
Why? I said
Because it’s late now. I’ve already
missed her. We’ll meet again if we are destined to otherwise not, he replied
His expression made me very curious to
know about his love. I forced him to tell me his story. With some hesitation he
agreed and flowed his entire feeling in these words.
Over these
years, I have struggled stopping people to get closer to me for fear of losing
them the way I had lost so many before. She was the person who changed
everything, who made difference, who gave me a story to tell. This story may
lose something in words; it may lose many things in fact because bringing your
heart in your mouth is very difficult task. Yet, I’m drawing some words to
sketch our story. As I said it’s our story, I will tell this story not only
from my perspective only but from her perspective also. After hearing this
story you will get the answer of, how we fall for each other?
Me (When I meet her for first
time)
I saw her! I don’t remember how i
had felt, when i saw her face. She was more beautiful than the day before, she
will appear more beautiful than today the day after; because day by day i was
being impressed by her complexions. How will you fell if you can’t unveil your
passion to the person you like? It’s really very difficult! I meet her every day at IELTS class. Even
then i was unaware that this friendship will change into hidden passionate
love. People say that there are some relations which can’t be given any name.
Same paradox lingers between us. Meeting every day, ringing at night, and
shearing feelings was like daily stuff; yet we hadn’t crossed any limit of
infatuation which cliché that we are just friend.
The beginning of the end of our
friendship started in Kathmandu mall when she revealed her desire to enter
horror house. As we entered my legs quivered, mind became more alert and cold chill
went through my spine. At all sudden! She hugged me, probably unable to resist
fear her body was trembling; i embraced her gently and felt her breath in my
heart. Some gust of air was struggling to pass from between us but we shove it
to the end of horror house. I don’t know whether she had changed or my
perspective towards her change, i saw her more beautiful than ever. I think i
fell in love. . . . . .
Her (when she meets me for
first time)
My parents were living in
Australia and I was also trying every approach to settle with them. In course
of struggle, destiny took me in IELTS class to be his best companion. Every
time he used to be happy even in trivial things. His every word seemed like
dialogues as if he had waited for long to speak. He had more manner than
manhood. He seemed like other modern guys in words only not in behavior. He
frequently tease me saying “will you marry me “ but every time he hesitated to
sit close to me. When I sweep near to him, he would say, ‘let some air pass’.
Till today this word resonates in my mind. I got many chance to recognize his
hidden innocence. He used to hold my hand while crossing road during rush hour;
but I never ask him why? I thought it would merely be inferiority complex for
him. I don’t know when I lost myself in his innocence.
Our imminence crossed the edge of
friendship. Slowly and gradually he began to occupy that place in my heart
where my parents used to reside. I forgot my dream to live in Australia; And
this IELTS class became Innes- free for me. One day little coincident happened
to unite us as a paramour. After that he appeared to be like responsible
person; those unreasonable happiness and funny acts were rarely seen. A part of
mine utters that I have changed that person. I think I made a mistake. . . . . .
It is said that people seem like fantasy when they are too distant. It
usually happens, when someone is very wonderful, they disappear easily like
bubble of water. Now she is not with me.
She has become a sweet dream that always dwells in my memory. This story ends
here and I’m still alive, expecting another story in life. Because I believe,
one shouldn’t let themselves die before their heartbeat stops. There is always
someone to take a place, someone to fill the gap, someone to revive the heart.
Wait, wait, another story means now you are with another girl, I asked
No yar, i said I’m expecting another story,
So you have find another one,
Yes,
Who is she? What’s her name? I ask curiously
Umm…eh…she is one of our classmate and I prefer to call her “a sweet
little thing alive to fill hope in my life” he replied with a curve in his face.
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